FINAL COLUMN

As We Pass

I do beg your pardon for the following selfish entry::

I was in the middle of writing a piece on the degradation of the English language through the poetics of the past (specifically on the use of the terms related to “touch” when describing emotions) when I lost her. And not just her, but what was to be a previously decided path of life. I was to move away, far away, to a brand new world filled with intrigue, beauty, love, and personal peace.

But alas, the stress that comes with loss pits some of us at the bottom/supply-side of the food-web, as prey, and sets the rest of us outside the system entirely…as foreign invasives without a suitable means of survival. Life in all it’s statuses never ceases to bombard us with adversity, manages to find ways to crumble the foundation of even our best laid plans. Without it, we would never know what it means to love, but as soon as we know it, it soon takes it all back. And sadly, you never know the meaning of your life, itself, until moments before it’s gone. This is a reality we all must face.

Every morning I wake up anticipating certain things… But those thoughts never make it passed the cerebral. There’s a distance, a divide between us, that seems closer & further depending on my mood. One moment she seems closer than she is, almost within grabbing distance, while at other times she feels worlds away.

While my best laid plans have crumbled beneath my feet, I continue my journey, knowing that someday our paths will cross again. This comforts me. I will always think of you… And no matter what the resolve–no matter how sad, hurt, longing, or happy our memories may be–they are what they are…and I love them for that.

Tags: distance, journey, life, longing, loss, lost, love, mom, new, selfish

The Financial District Pt. 2

Morning faces tell it all. Come the end of the day, you pretty much expect to see the grotesque, but the beginning of the work day should fill us with promise, not self-remorse…unless you just woke up to something or someone uncommonly “sloppy.” This is how I know that we’re doing everything all wrong.

It is my opinion that THIS is perhaps the largest similarity between the haves and the have-nots:

We all hate what we’re doing…at least a little bit.

Those who actually enjoy what they do… I haven’t met one of those in a long time. And, now come to think of it, those who hold that romantic view of professionalism must surely be oblivious as to how unfair life really is. It’s too short to enjoy all this world has to give us, but entitely too long for one profession to keep you interested through the years. Life gets to that point where it stops giving you things and starts taking then back long before you stop working. How and when are we to enjoy life?

San Francisco, my home, my city, is a Mecca for the modern professional ignoramus. We wake up in a shit mood, haul our asses to work, are in misery there, go home unsatisfied, “wash, rinse, and repeat.” My yuppie-filled abode, we have so much…but it’s all come at a great cost. Just look at our morning faces.

Tags: faces, Financial District, iPhone, morning, oblivious, professional, san francisco

iPhone 3g + Anyone = Jackass

So I’ve come to the discovery that every time someone uses their iPhone in public, that they instantly become an asshole. “Why?” one might ask. Well, I believe I have the answer. If you look like a douche, act like an arrogant SOB, and have a cell phone that doubles as a status symbol (to borrow from my sister) … Chances are that the world has every right to hate you.

Just like BMW drivers. Instant assholes. Just sit behind the wheel…it takes 5 minutes for the transformation to be complete! Soon you’ll find yourself in Dolce sunglasses, sporting a fresh spray tan, and vineered teeth. Also, you become the non-redneck version of Jeff Gordon. How odd, right? Grannies who usually drive 10 miles below the speed limit suddenly have 3 points in their record for speeding.

The iPhone has a similar effect, and I hate it. I find myself whipping it out for no good reason (but I mask this embarrassing admission by saying I’m checking my shifty battery life). It is kinsa funny to see who loo–see what i mean?! The whole Apple culture just makes me feel so… Dirty. I also have the Black Macbook…total douche laptop. Thanks a lot Steve Jobs…way to turn me into a poster child for the evil fruit empire.

Where do we go from here? How can I break free from the stigma associated with this phone? I suppose that once everyone has an iPhone, that we’ll all stop caring about it. I doubt this’ll ever happen, but i’m hoping for it.

Until then, I’ll borrow from what Nacho said about his earthly things, “they may have the appearance of riches, but beneath them, you find a man…and beneath the man you find his… nucleus.”

So lord help us all… Make the stupid iPhone so common that I’ll turn back to who I used to be!

Tags: annoy, bart, iPhone, public